Maybe you are wondering how to increase your confidence. Or maybe you don’t realize it would be useful. Lack of confidence is like a ball and chain. Pregnant, bothers and effectively limits. When you walk through life with such dubious beauty adornment at the ankle, you are accompanied by constant reproaches and disappointment with your own person. After all, it could have been better, more, different! It is difficult to live constantly wanting to please everyone else, always seeking their acceptance and being frustrated. As a psychologist, I tell women these examples of things practically every day:
“You have the right to set limits”
“You can implement this plan”
“you’re a beautiful woman”
“You have the right to happiness”
“You deserve good love”
What do I hear in response?
“How will someone be offended?”
“What if it turns out that I can’t do it?”
“I have gained weight / my legs are too short / … put any …”
“Yeah sure … then why am I still failing?”
“And if no one wants me? / And how am I condemned to loneliness? / Maybe something is wrong with me?”
I don’t give up, although I do feel angry at times. Not my clients, but the fact that it affects them at all and limits them so much.
Be confident! Believe in yourself! These slogans are repeated with great passion. It’s just a pity that he ends up shouting them, but he doesn’t pay attention to how to achieve it. I assure you – you will not achieve it with a thinner butt, bigger breasts or a better salary. The guy by your side won’t give you that either, no matter how much he adored you. Why? Because you simply will not allow yourself to do it, and even if you were ready, the well-ordered gentleman would run away from you, where the pepper grows. Nobody wants to be a savior and distributor pumping up your poor self-esteem. Don’t be surprised, no one would.
Nobody is born with high self-esteem
Self-esteem is strengthened by loved ones or by strangers but sympathetic people we meet on our way. It happens, however, that as a result of various life turbulences, challenges and meetings, self-confidence can significantly decrease, or … reveal the brutal truth and show that it has never really been normal. Just like one stumble and all bones are broken! Moreover, lowered self-esteem can be compared to a weakened immune system. You may really be willing, but you lack faith in your own abilities.
You can certainly try for three, and always “something” will go wrong. Common difficulties that you encounter in life affect you much more than those who take them on their chests and live on … without persistent reflection and searching for answers to hundreds of unnecessary questions. Would you like that too, but you have no idea how to do it? Believe me, it’s not that these “other” people were born with supernatural powers. Of course – there are some of them who are simply not in the habit of spending a moment reflecting on anything that they absolutely should not envy, because it is a kind of emotional disability. The rest, however, learn to take care of themselves all the time.
Difficult life, difficult things
The experience of failure, rejection or stress is a real ordeal for a person with low self-esteem. It’s like walking barefoot on Lego bricks. Failures cause emotional pain, loss of motivation and often remorse. The level of anxiety is increasing, because if you want to be accepted by the rest of the world, you have to think “ahead”. Avoid mistakes at all costs and be the Perfect Lady. And I’ll tell you something – you’ll never be good enough. As a consolation, I will add that only until you discover your resources or remember them.
Also read the article: Are You Fit For a Relationship ? I Answer!
I’ll tell you something in secret …
You have it all in you. Hidden, forgotten or simply undiscovered. The most important thing, however, is that it is in your possession. You have to start looking, my friend! If you do not do this, you will probably be “too not so” all your life and in your “non-attitude” mistakenly believe that:
if you were prettier …
or maybe if you were better educated …
in addition, if you were kinder …
and if you tried harder …
if you would then smile more to the right than to the left …
or maybe if you said it differently …
if you …
and also if you …
It’s time to end this. Because you have one life. Every day 86,400 seconds available. Stop using them for whipping and sprinkling your wounds with salt, or throwing logs at your feet and analyzing everything more than necessary. And I know that even if I write here now that every woman is beautiful, has a chance for success, the right to set limits, deserves love, respect and happiness, you will probably turn your nose anyway. Well, you know! What is happiness, my dear, you know at all? Do you know what it is like to stop thinking about whether someone will get offended when you say NO? Do you know what it’s like to receive compliments without embarrassment? Or maybe you’ve experienced this feeling when you say to yourself:
Yes you deserve!
Of course you can!
Yes, you have the right!
Sure you’re ok!
If so – great, because that’s really great news.
You have a choice
If not, you have two choices. Either of them will be okay because it will be a choice that is compatible with you. First, you can further expose yourself to any emotional bacteria that are attacking your weakened emotional immune system with redoubled force. It’s a bit like dying in life, but of course – you have the right to be a zombie. Secondly, at the moment you can also twist your leg a little more vigorously, roll your eyes, look at the ceiling, think it’s time to go to death and dare to change. Of course, the decision is yours. So what do you say?
READ THIS ARTICLE To find out more!